10 Things Jay-Z Has That You Don't

Tonight (September 11th) Jay-Z once again takes over Madison Square Garden for his "Answer The Call" concert. The concert is the 8th time Jay-Z has sold-out MSG and further adds to the meteoric nature of Jay-Z's star. It's pretty good to be Hov. So good that here are 10 Things Jay-Z Has That You Don't.

1. BEYONCE

Imagine waking up beside Beyonce in the morning? I mean you could have been hit by a city bus the night before and be in a full body cast and I'm pretty sure you'd still wake up and think to yourself "this shit is great." Do you think Jay-Z hums "No, No, No" in his head while he's...you know.

2. MEMPHIS BLEEK

Wouldn't it be great to have a friend that never complained, had no interest in being as famous as you AND worked really hard when you asked them to? That's what Jay-Z has in Memphis Bleek. Memph Bleek is so good at being Jay-Z's sidekick it's almost like he got his degree in the fine art of being a hypeman with a minor in weed carrying (which came in handy in the early years). We could all use a little Memphis Bleek in our lives...no homo just in case.

3. A MULTI-PLATINUM ALBUM THAT DROPPED ON THE WORST DAY IN U.S. HISTORY

Jay-Z's "Blueprint" album was released on September 11th, 2001 which was arguably the worst day in the history of the United States. The album still sold over 400,000 copies during its first week in stores (people ACTUALLY went to the record store that week and bought it) and went on to sell double platinum. Doves could carry Chingy's new album to the record store on the sunniest, warmest Tuesday of the year as children sold lemonade out front and the thing wouldn't sell 20,000 copies. Jay is a beast.

4. ONE OF THE FUNNIEST SCENES IN THE HISTORY OF FILM

Jay-Z's "Fade To Black" movie was a dope look inside the making of his "Black Album" and provided an in-depth picture of the creativity that is Jay-Z inside the studio...it also featured one of the funniest scenes in the history of film:

I really hope Timbaland didn't drink the entire jug of that pink stuff...when Timbo starts eating the banana it just screams "don't let this guy around your kids." Dude looks like a big rhino. Do you think the pink stuff and bananas were missing from the "Blueprint 3" sessions? I almost feel like DJ Khaled ripped off Timbaland's bouncin' around a few years later:

5. OPRAH'S CELL NUMBER

Imagine being able to just text message Oprah? Those would be some billion dollar "LOLs" going back and forth between Jay and O. I could never handle that responsibility. I'd always be pitching ideas to her like instead of "Oprah's Favorite Things" episode we do a "Favorite Things From The Audience" episode where people from Oprah's audience surprise her with a bunch of shit from their house...like someone might give Oprah an old chair..."IT'S AN OLD CHAIR!" Yeah I'm a genius.

6. $550 MILLION

Who would have thought Jay would go from "Ain't No N*gga" to $550 million? I think these young rappers are crazy for goin' at Jay 'cause this dude has enough money to get you murked and not even have anything to do with the planning. If I had $550 million the first thing I'd do would be start the H.P.A.B. Foundation. H.P.A.B. stands for "Help Pay Amil's Bills."

7. EXPERIENCE SELLING CRACK (EDTIOR'S NOTE: SOME OF THE MORE TRILL READERS MAY HAVE THIS)

They always say it's good to have something to fall back on so if this whole multi-millionaire, mega superstar, jet-setting, Beyonce having, basketball team owning, club poppin', Barack Obama ridin', record company growing, accomplished "business...maaaaaan" life doesn't work out for Jay-Z, he's got some experience selling crack.

8. THE SUMMER JAM SCREEN

No matter what other things may have showed on the screen at Hot 97's "Summer Jam" over the years, Jay-Z owns that screen because of this:

As Jay-Z prepares to perform at a sold-out Madison Square Garden tonight (September 11), Prodigy sits behind bars thinking he should have gone with black socks instead of white...even though the Michael Jackson look was huge in '88.

9. A PLACE ON BARACK OBAMA'S iPOD

I don't care if Jay-Z is already rich and famous, it still must have been crazy for him to hear that Barack Obama had his music on his iPod. You know you're doin' somethin right if the most powerful man in the world is bumpin' your shit. I wonder what's on Joe Wilson's iPod?:

Probably this:

10. A CLUB AND A BASKETBALL TEAM

Jay-Z is a part owner in the "40/40" chain of sports bars and the New Jersey Nets basketball team. What's crazy about that is when you're spending money at the "40/40 Club" while watching the Nets play, you're actually giving Jay-Z your money TWICE. And they call Einstein a genius. All Jay needs now is an NFL team, investment in the people who make couches and stools and money in a cable network. He would then effectively be removing all money from your wallet.

Comments

[Tango Blast]

Who said he has 550 million? Anything substantiated or another one of these "50 made 400 million with Vitamin Water' (which isn't true, btw).

[Cee]

U gotta love this dude. DAMN!!

[Yianni From Chicago]

I was one of those people who bought Blueprint the day it came out.. I ran to the cd shop to buy it before they closed down for the day.

[Realtalk]

He sold rockawear for over 100 mill
He got over 100 mill in the live nation deal
I forgot what he got for Rockafella

That's just the cash, we're not even talking assets yet. Ie clubs, catalogues, Nets, and other investments. It's pretty accurate.

And 50 made almost 200mil(confirmed) on the vitamin water deal, he never claimed 400 that was just the initial rumor.

[DertyD]

I'm mad Oprah got some ashy ass hands, all that money and no lotion...sad, lmao

[j2daedubblef]

could u be more on his dick?

[Smarten Up Broken Cool]

1. To consider Beyonce a "thing" is deplorably sexist.

2. The Strokes debut album was also released on 9/11 and it sold a lot of records too, big deal.

3. Only a herb would celebrate a wack ass stunt at a wack ass concert. Real heads know that The Infamous and Hell On Earth > Jay-Z's discography

[asdas]

you are a fucking idiot.

[CassavaLeaf]

I'll pass on Beyawnce...
If I had $550m (which isn't true) I'd be doing a Wal Mart heir

[jetblac]

Oh my, someone had too much hater juice today, daedubble...

you had me at Beyonce.

[Eastern_Digital]

the nigga owns about 5 % of the Nets. Stop acting like he's calling any shots.

[b-moore]

get off his dick groupie nigga

[MD]

Lol must agree with the above. The guy who came up with/wrote this is well and truly past "fan" and venturing deep into the abyss of stannery. BP3 is an absolute gem to me - been on repeat for 2 weeks - but he is still just an artist. You need to fall back and focus on your life. Damn!

[fhjfh]

who wrote this dick suckin bullshit?? this stannery is disgustin b

[Thoth]

5% ownership is about 16 million. And, not only does he have Oprah's cell he got Leborn's cell too. 5% is a number let talk about his influence. Jay could build an all star team with his pull.

[Eastern_Digital]

Sayin Jay owns the Nets is like sayin Venus and Serena own the Dolphins. They just celebs for showcase purposes. If they wanted to go to Queens, they would've hollered at 50.

[blackheart]

Im feeling everything Jay be doing, from his movement's to his unit's the nigga is doing want you and I want to do get money and live life. Shit i wanna be remember to. peace

[Coney Isle Bklyn]

To have been a crack/dope dealer and never gotten caught; and to have accomplished and amassed that much asset legally, yo, that's gangster.

[Australia UGG]

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